This concept comes from Kate Murphy’s excellent book “You’re Not Listening: What You’re Missing and Why It Matters“. For many of us silence can be challenging, it is often considered a sign that something is wrong. What happens when we approach the quiet ones with curiosity?

Certainly, here’s the revised blog post:

Inspired by Kate Murphy’s insightful book “You’re Not Listening: What You’re Missing and Why It Matters”, the hosts discuss the potential misunderstandings around silence and the importance of curiosity in understanding quieter team members.

The episode opens by examining who the ‘quiet ones’ might be and the reasons behind their silence. Tim shares a compelling story of a manager who is often quiet due to an unexpected reason, emphasizing that silence can stem from a myriad of personal contexts.

A pivotal point is made about the distinction between choosing not to speak and feeling unable to speak. The hosts stress the role of managers in fostering a safe environment where everyone feels comfortable to contribute. This point highlights the importance of psychological safety in enhancing team communication.

Pilar shares valuable quotes from Murphy’s book about the profound impact silence can have on communication. The discussion then ventures into the nuanced differences between being silent with someone versus being silent to someone. This distinction provides a fresh perspective on how silence can shape interpersonal dynamics.

The conversation circles back to the importance of understanding the individual and their context. Pilar and Tim share examples where curiosity about a person’s communication style yields intriguing insights. They note that negative past experiences can lead individuals to prefer safer communication channels.

Lastly, the episode explores various skillful and less skillful methods managers can employ to help quiet individuals express themselves. The conversation underscores the necessity for managers to be sensitive and adaptable, employing different strategies based on their understanding of each individual’s unique needs and experiences.

The episode highlights the important managerial role of giving a voice to the quiet ones, a role that calls for empathy, curiosity, and flexibility. As managers, fostering an environment that encourages everyone to speak up is vital in building successful, inclusive teams.

We are curious about you, dear listener? Do you give the quiet ones a voice? We’d love to hear from you.

Get in touch through our Contact Form https://managementcafepodcast.com/contact/  or tell us on Twitter – we are @managementcaf 

---

TIME CODED SHOW NOTES

1:30min Who are the quiet ones? Why might they be quiet

3:00 Tim shares a story of a manager who was often quiet for an unexpected reason.

5:00 There is a big difference between choosing not to speak and not feeling able to speak. Managers should create an atmosphere where it is safe for people to contribute if they wish to.

6:00 Pilar shares some quotes from the book about the impact that silence can have on communication. And we dive into being silent with someone versus being silent to someone.

10:30 Understanding the person and their context can make all the difference in how we interpret and react to someone being quiet. Pilar and Tim share some instances where being curious about someone’s communication lead to interesting insights.

18:45 People who have had bad prior experiences tend to use to the safest communication channels in future.

21:00 We explore some of the skilful and less skilful ways managers can help the quiet ones have a voice.

We are curious about you, dear listener? Do you give the quiet ones a voice? We’d love to hear from you.

Get in touch through our Contact Form https://managementcafepodcast.com/contact/  or tell us on Twitter – we are @managementcaf