As managers we will normally have a peer network within our company. But occasionally we might experience problems that our in-house peer network can’t help us with. For example, when the issue is with those same colleagues or our organisation itself. At times like this an external professional network can be invaluable.

In this conversation Pilar and Tim primarily talk about networks which can provide different forms of support such as showing a different perspective, learning from someone with more or different experience, getting greater clarity in your own thoughts through talking them out, or even just solidarity from someone who’s suffered in a similar way.

No surprise that our hosts, who have never met in person, have both had success in building relationships and networks online. Over coffee they share some of the techniques that have worked for them to expand and sustain their professional networks.

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00:30 mins Pilar calls back to our conversation about men’s mental health at work to highlight that building a network outside your organisation can be a valuable strategy when you’re struggling to be yourself at work.

1:25 Tim shares how external support network helped him when he was struggling and feeling isolated. These mutually beneficial relationships are much more positive and rewarding than his first conceptions of business networks – like “old boys networks” as a back channel for getting a job.

3:00 Pilar used to do a lot of networking to get work, but she approached it as reaching out to people she enjoyed talking to. She has found this led to relationships that were long-lasting and much more fun.

4:30 Things changed for Tim when he realised that he enjoyed being helpful. This brought him into contact with a lot more people, some of whom became a network.

5:30 Networking will mean different things to us at different points in our career and our lives. The key for Pilar and one of her strengths is how to sustain those relationships.

7:00 She shares some of the ways she has built networks and communities like the Virtual Team Talk Slack Group and a new writing community she is building.

9:00 Tim has been lucky in joining existing communities where his “being helpful” approach helped him integrate. He prefers this to transactional networking, where you are aiming for a particular outcome.

11:10 It is so helpful for managers to be able to talk freely with other people who have had similar experiences. Getting different perspectives and insights or even just solidarity is an enormous advantage when you are stuck, or caught up in your own thoughts and emotions. Tim references the Rands Leadership Slack community created by Michael Lopp as a place he’s been able to get help outside of his workplace.

13:00 You don’t want to wait until you’re going through a really tricky situation before you start trying to find support. Building a good network takes time!

14:00 Companies could assign some of their learning and development budgets to encourage people to build their networks and learn outside their organisation.

14:45 As a shy person, Pilar has had success asking people to introduce her to others. Even her mum has made some great introductions for her!

15:45 Tim has found reaching out to people digitally has been really helpful. Especially so he had some familiar faces at a conference or event.

17:45 Donut calls can be an easy way to build connections within Slack communities. Tim meets several new people each month this way.

19:30 KLM, the Dutch airline, once piloted a program called Meet & Seat which let passengers choose people they wanted to connect with on a flight.

20:15 At various times in Tim and Pilar’s friendship she’s brought groups together. For example during Covid there were small “Coffee around the corner” groups Pilar created for Zoom calls which she and Tim both enjoyed.

21:00 Tim encourages listeners to have an open mind about what value they might get from meeting new people in a professional context and building relationships with them.

What about you, dear listener? Do you actively cultivate professional relationships outside your organisation? We’d love to hear from you!
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